Monday, December 29, 2008
2008
Monday, November 03, 2008
Movin' out
It was about time. Quite frankly, it was actually past time I moved out. I think I got too comfortable living there, and ended up staying longer than I should have. Living together with another person for an extender period of time is a very tricky stunt to pull off. More often than not it is not possible to keep up - small things acquire a tendency of groing out of proportions, and that tendency only grows.
Needless to say, this kind of stuff can end up being very nocive to a friendship. I know for a fact that from now on I have to work on rebuilding mine with Daniel, which got more than a few bruises in that process.
Due to several factors I decided to move back in with my mom. I don't intend to discuss the reasons why I did it, but the one massively responsible is, I think, quite obvious.
So now I am going through the process of reacquainting myself with Itu, and slowly taking back my old bedroom - it doesn't feel the same after all these years. Actually I don't think it ever will. So many things are different from almost ten years ago that there's no way it would get even close to being the same.
There are many details that need to be worked out yet, but in time everything will be on its place.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
1 mês.
Monday, September 29, 2008
Master
Everything was absolutely great. In fact I was quite worried because I had a sore throat since the day before, and so there was a chance that I wouldn't have a voice to use in my presentation. However, even though my throat didn't get all better I was able to do it without any further problems.
Also, I'm glad to say that the presentation itself was absolutely flawless. The examining comitee had a few points to make about the dissertation itself, but they were all minor. There were also lots of comments and general questions about stuff related to the work. All in all, however, there were more compliments than any other thing. I was very proud, and so was my advisor.
On a particular note, one of the members of the comitee knew my father from childhood. He made a "statement", so to speak, at the end , in which he expressed personal satisfaction with my defense, since he was involved in my decision to major in Physics.
It almost made me cry, because he remembered my dad in a way that is most cherished by me. But it also made me very happy, because I will never forget that.
Friday, September 19, 2008
My father.
We talked about many things. Family, friends, grad school, the Higgs boson...
But I can't help but think that I never said that I loved him, very much, enough times. I am sure he knew that, but this feeling never goes away.
Of all the people who were part of my life until now, he was the one person who was responsible for me being who I am today. He was the one person I looked up to the most.
With him I learned the facts of life. That life is much more than the endless pursuit of money or knowledge or love or anything. That life must be lived to the fullest. And that one only accomplishes that by taking the most out of every moment. "Carpe diem" was his message.
Most of all, the one thing I am going to miss most is the unshakable faith he had in me. For every moment in my whole life, good or bad, he was always there. He was always the first one to support me, regardless of the situation. I always knew I could count on him. And, whenever the outlook on things seemed dark, he would say: "don't worry, be happy". And, like magic, all problems suddenly became no more than a footnote.
He was human, though. And, as such, he made a lot of mistakes. To me the really important thing is that, no matter what, he always aimed for the best and never gave up.
From now on, whenever I have difficulties in life, I won't worry. I'll be happy, because the memory of my father will remain with me. And I will remember that I'm human, and that most certainly I will make a lot of mistakes. But I will always aim for the best, and I will never give up.
Tuesday, September 02, 2008
24 hours.
She's going to be away for three years to do her PhD. Although the possibility existed ever since I first met her, it only became real abou two months ago when she finally got accepted.
I have to admit that part of me was kinda hoping she wouldn't get it. I do not need to be reminded that it was narrow-minded and selfish, to say the least. It's the opportunity of a lifetime.
When she first me told me I kept silent for a long time before saying anything. Not because I was mad or anything, but because I was in shock. I'm not sure why - all I know is that there's something about long-distance relationships that really freaks me out. I can't tell what it is. I know people who were in LDRs before - some of those worked out and some didn't. One way or another, I know for a fact that it's very difficult, especially for someone as paranoid as I am. I think that's an issue I will have to learn how to deal with.
Of all the problems I am facing these days this is the one I should not be worrying about, because both of us are quite sure about how we feel about each other and are committed to making it work. I have problems that have absolutely not a chance to be solbed quickly or easily, since they require both patience and perseverance, not to mention all the help I can get.
But she's all I can think about.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Is a car worth it?
To be honest, that bugs me. A LOT. Not because I don't think having a car is important, but because I can't help but feel like there are so many things that are more important than that. I'm not even sure what they are, all I know is that they're there.
I think I'm beginning to realize that I'm not gonna live forever, that I'm not gonna be ever 20 years old. And, quite frankly, it scares the crap out of me, because all I can think is what the hell I'm going to do when I finish grad school. Sometimes it feels like walls closing in on me, like I'm trapped in a place which gets harder and harder to escape from. That becomes especially - and painfully - true when I see so many good people, extremely competent professionals, having problems to get a position somewhere. Mostly in this country, which seems not to give a crap to basic research.
I am a reasonably optimistic person, and as such I hope all of this will just pass away, provided I work hard and persevere.
Anyway, I guess I just needed to get something out of my system. I haven't been able to post recently, but that doesn't mean there's nothing going on in my life. Actually, it's the other way around.
Sunday, August 03, 2008
Chafé Imperialista my ass!
Com uma coluninha besta no Destak (reproduzida ao lado porque o site do Destak é uma porcaria) ele tentou se fazer de entendido em café falando um monte de bobagem sobre um café que ele obviamente não experimentou. Coisa que ele próprio já afirmou, ao dizer que se recusa "a entrar nesses lugares que profanam a genuína arte de sorver o cafezinho".
Eu confesso que, logo que fiquei sabendo da abertura da Starbucks no Brasil, fiquei preocupado, porque afinal o tal "chafé" é mesmo coisa de americano. E eu gosto de café bem forte. Mas essas dúvidas sumiram assim que experimentei o café deles, que, apesar de não ser o café mais forte de São Paulo, é muito bom.
De fato, o que me agrada na Starbucks não é apenas o café, mas também o atendimento e o ambiente, que são muito agradáveis. Se o que esse babaca chama de imperialismo é atender com educação e um sorriso, se é oferecer um sofá confortável para o cliente se sentar enquanto aprecia a bebida, se é oferecer degustações dos diversos tipos de café oferecidos pela loja, então que venha o Imperialismo!
Mas, como eu digo, gosto é que nem cu: cada um tem o seu e todo mundo gosta de meter o pau no dos outros.
Se o Giron prefere, como diz, o café em copo sujo de boteco, azar o dele. Eu vou continuar passando nos Imerialistas (Starbucks e Havanna, que se espalhem mais e mais) sempre que puder. E os neuro-xenófobos que se fodam.
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
(good/bad/nothing) year
Since then a lot has happened. Both good and bad things came up, and a strange, bitter-sweet feeling was already beginning to settle.
My intention here was to write about many things that are happening that I have to handle one way or another. But right now, even though moments like this are the best for me to sit down and write some good stuff, I'm not really in the mood, because there's still a lot going around in my mind and I'm still not sure what's gonna happen next.
Friday, June 13, 2008
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Injustiça.
Alício Pena Junior
Isso mesmo, o árbitro. Esse FILHO DA PUTA ajudou o Corinthians a dar a Copa de graça para o Sport. Impedimentos inexistentes, faltas que não aconteceram, cartões que não foram dados.
Tudo isso, aliado à performance PATÉTICA do Corinthians, fez do Sport o campeão. Porque, vamos combinar, esse time é uma merda.
E o Corinthians fez o jogo do Sport desde o início. Caiu direitinho nas armações dos pernambucanos. E não estou falando de jogo. Estou falando da incompetência do juiz, que cometeu erro atrás de erro. Estou falando da inocência de Mano Menezes, que mostrara tão bem a sua qualidade, fazendo do Corinthians um time vencedor que dominou completamente o Sport no Morumbi, que dirigiu mal a equipe e não soube prever o comportamento do adversário. Estou falando do nervosismo patético dos jogadores, que não souberam manter a calma e jogaram como se fossem um time de várzea, sem querer saber de armar jogadas, dando chute pra frente. "Bola pro mato que o jogo é de campeonato" não funciona, porra!
O pior de tudo não é ter perdido o campeonato. É aquele FILHO DA PUTA do Carlinhos Bala, aquele trocinho de bosta, que saiu limpo com as merdas que andou falando. Wellington Saci foi expulso à toa. Se era pra ser expulso, que pelo menos quebrasse esse palhaço no meio.
Sport causando na final
O Sport disponibilizou menos ingressos que o número que se é obrigado por lei a vender para os torcedores do time visitante. A caravana corinthiana para Recife corre o risco de não entrar do estádio.
E aí me vem o presidente do Sport dizendo que seremos tratados lá como eles foram tratados aqui. Ora, vá à merda. Aquele cocozinho de torcida nem sequer ocupou todo o setor destinado a eles, e eles ficam reclamando??
Isso é tudo cortina de fumaça. Eles SABEM que o Corinthians é o melhor time. E não estou falando isso porque sou corinthiano, qualquer um que viu o jogo de quarta-feira passada sabe disso.
Verdade seja dita, o Sport é um time pequeno. E está tentando aparecer do jeito errado.
2x1 hoje à noite. E nem importa pra quem!
Thursday, June 05, 2008
Stadium Arcadium, pt. 2
O jogo começou bem, em pouco tempo o Corinthians fez 2x0 e a gente pensou que seria uma goleada histórica.
Mas aí o time desanimou, começou a esperar pelo contra-ataque, e Felipe começou a trabalhar. E o Sport começou a ganhar espaço. Ainda assim, o Corinthians estava melhor em campo, então não deu muita chance. Na verdade, quase que o Herrera faz o terceiro, se não errasse um gol inerrável... mas enfim.
Aí veio o segundo tempo. O time voltou menos audacioso, esperando o Sport atacar. Num contra-ataque veio o terceiro gol.
Mas o Sport melhorou muito no segundo tempo. Começou a pressionar, fez Felipe trabalhar de verdade. Quando o juiz anunciou 3 minutos de acréscimo, todo mundo relaxou, achando que estava no fim. E aí, num erro do árbitro, o Sport teve a chance que queria e fez o gol de honra. Bosta. Gol fora de casa vale mais.
No fim das contas, pensando bem esse gol do Sport foi bom pra dar uma chacoalhada no povo. Já estavam cantando "é campeão", como se tivessem esquecido do jogo em Recife. Foi bom pra deixar todo mundo esperto.
Infelizmente, não posso ir pra Recife. Quarta que vem, torço em casa mesmo.
===========
PS: Ficou faltando a epopéia para conseguir o ingresso. 6 horas debaixo de frio e chuva no domingo, mais umas duas na segunda, pagar o dobro do esperado, entre outras agruras. Mas valeu a pena.
Monday, June 02, 2008
Indiana Jones e a Caveira de Cristal
A única coisa que me incomodou nesse filme foi o final. Ficou "Spielbergiano" demais. Pra variar, Steven Spielberg não tem noção nenhuma e acaba fazendo merda no final. Não foi suficiente pra estragar o filme, mas chegou perto.
Fora isso, tem umas surpresas legais no filme e, no geral, mantém o clima dos outros filmes. Eu gostei bastante e pretendo assistir de novo.
Fato curioso foi a queda de energia no meio do filme. Perto do final, a energia caiu e o cinema ficou uns minutos às escuras. Uma funcionária do Cinemark veio avisar que já iam recomeçar o filme de onde tinha parado. Pouco depois, o filme recomeçou, mas não do mesmo ponto, e sim de um ponto um pouco mais à frente. Foi o suficiente pra ninguém prestar atenção mais no filme pra ficar xingando o projecionista por mais uns 5 minutos. Idiotice, porque não se rebobina uma fita assim.
De qualquer maneira, na saída a gerência do cinema já estava preparada para devolver o dinheiro ou dar outro ingresso pra quem ainda estivesse com o bilhete. Obviamente, teve uns imbecis que acharam que seria mais produtivo fazer escândalo. Afinal, eles são brasileiros.
===============
Pequeno adendo: o zelador de Scrubs ficou muito bom :P
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Stadium Arcadium
Ontem o Corinthians se classificou para a final da Copa do Brasil.
Há tempos que eu não me envolvia tanto com uma partida de futebol. A última vez que fiquei grudado assim na TV assistindo o jogo e passando mal de nervoso foi acho que em 98, na final do Brasileiro. Por algum motivo, desde então eu havia perdido grande parte do meu interesse em acompanhar o futebol. Provavelmente foi a baixaria que rola solta nos bastidores, a falta de organização e a falta de profisisonalismo dos dirigentes brasileiros.
Mas, desde que fui assistir a São Paulo x Internacional no Morumbi, no ano passado, esse interesse aos poucos vem aumentando novamente. Desde então tenho tentado ir ao estádio, sem sucesso. Ontem foi mais uma dessas ocasiões. Só não estive presente ao jogo porque não consegui chegar antes de os ingressos terem acabado.
Mas, agora, tem a final.
Friday, May 23, 2008
Debian, APT and gpg keys
One thing no one had the decency of explaining is how to get a certain repository's key into one's "trusted ring" so apt won't complain when downloading packages from there.
Well, I'm going to go right to the point and tell exactly what to do.
- Add the repository's address to sources.list (if you have any doubts try man 5 sources.list)
- Reload the package lists (through "apt-get update" or Synaptic's "Reload"). It will complain about not having the key to the repository. In that complaint, it will show you the ID of the repository. Write down the last 8 digits of it.
- With this information in hands, you're able to download that repository's key using the following command (replace XXXXXXXX with the number you wrote down):
- Now all you have to do is to import that key into apt's key database:
- And you're done. Now run refresh the package lists again and apt won't bug you anymore.
gpg --keyserver wwwkeys.eu.pgp.net --recv-keys XXXXXXXX
gpg --armor --export XXXXXXXX | apt-key add -
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Driving Permission in a week
All in all, it was pretty easy, actually. Easier than I expected, though, to be honest, I wasn't sure what to expect. Anyway I was very calm and relaxed and, as I mentioned before, I was very confident I would not fail. Now I believe that the only factor that's really measured with some significance is one's serenity. The course is very easy - actually, I'm convinced that it's too easy. And, from what I've seen, people who failed the exam was really nervous about it. I confess I was nervous, too, but I was able to control it and not to make a fool of myself.
Now in a week or so I will have my provisional license (around here new drivers get a provisional license for a year before getting a definitive one) and will be officially looking for a car.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
I wanna have Time 5.
To think that in about two months I'll be defending my masters is a bit frightening, to be honest. I'm not sure I'm prepared for that, and there is still a lot to do.
At least now I don't have any more data to collect. All I have to do is write write write write write. And then write some more.
I've been practicing a lot on the guitar, and a few tunes are beginning to come out of the amp; although they are not THAT good - they are actually very simple songs used for practice - at least it's something. A month ago I wouldn't have been able to do even that. There is still a long way before I can do anything for real. And, to be honest, practice can be very frustrating sometimes.
I realize that frustration is actually part of the process, and therefore I will keep trying. The more difficulty I have, the more I will practice. That's the way I believe we may overcome difficulties.
In other news, my field exam for obtaining my driver's license in on next wednesday. I feel fully prepared and, to be honest, I'm very confident. In the classes I've had so far I really learned more than just enough to be approved; I learned a bit of how to really drive - out on the street, in traffic, having to withstand other (usually less careful, less educated) drivers. Surely, the fact that the car had the sign "driving school" on its side may have made a difference on other people's behavior (which is frankly quite hypocrite). But even so, it was not a futile exercise.
All in all, everything seems to be going well. I just need to pay a little more attention to my dissertation - it needs a lot of work.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Lack of planning
My PIXE studies for my masters are linked to other studies by other people with other objectives. A scientific initiation student from the Chemistry Institute, is one of them.
She's planning on attending a congress on thermal analysis in september, and the abstract submission deadline is May 5.
The problem: she only called me to ask for PIXE results last friday.
I have to say, that's not how it works. I didn't know she would need those data. That's because she didn't bother explaining that to me. I actually never had any idea about what the hell she wanted with my data - only that she and her advisor kept bugging me about them. For all I knew, I was going to be the only one directly using those data.
What really ticks me off is that her lack of planning is causing me stress, because that's the way I react to that sort of things. From where I stand, she's likely to miss the deadline. And that's a VERY frustrating perspective.
I can't say I don't care about her work, but if something goes wrong and she misses the deadline, I will not be upset.
This time, the noob was not me.
Monday, April 21, 2008
Happy, but a bit frustrated
No surprises there. As predicted, it was pathetic. The only question (out of thirty) I missed concerned knowing by heart the seriousness of "not updating the register of vehicle or driver's license". Honestly, how would that be useful in traffic?
Certainly it's desirable to know of such things, but I don't think it's essential to becoming a good driver. Actually, I think that, being quite permissive, I can count on the fingers of one hand how many questions on that examination in fact evaluated anything.
But that's not what scares me the most. What really freaks me out is the driver of the van that took us to the Transit Department committing countless infractions (including overloading the vehicle). It's a guy who's only taking the time to go through the habilitation process because he needs the license to get a job (he's been driving a motorbike for more than six months). It's a guy who hopes "this time he's gonna get through" (and who apparently has never seen a woman before). Being aware that people like that are going eventually to be on the streets (if they aren't already) is what freaks me out, because that means that, even if I'm careful enough, they certainly won't be, and they will cause trouble (perhaps that's why traffic is so chaotic around here).
Anyway, now I'm having driving classes - the real ones. For starters, I can say I like driving. Which is good and bad at the same time. On one hand, driving can be a pleasant experience. On the other hand, however, I have frustrating times ahead of me, because I'm switching from not-driving-because-I-don't-have-a-license to I-have-a-license-but-I-can't-drive-anyway.
But I don't think that really matters anyway. Eventually I will get a car and will be subject to the stressful activity of driving (?) in the increasingly problematic traffic jams that so well characterize the city of São Paulo.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Old dog, new tricks.
A princípio, nada demais, todo mundo passa por isso. O que realmente me incomoda é a sensação de esse exame ser meio inútil, porque a menos que todo mundo com quem conversei a respeito tenha combinado de me enganar, o exame parece ser coisa de imbecil - só mesmo um analfabeto ou um completo sem noção pra não passar nessa prova.
O que, de certa forma, não é de todo surpreendente, considerando o país onde eu vivo. Mas o que realmente me deixa puto é o fato de que o exame prático não parece ser muito melhor. Pelo que vejo, tenho três opções: dar (muita) sorte e pegar um examinador rigoroso, que fique pentelhando com cada detalhe, ou cair em um de dois desdobramentos indesejáveis: aceitar ou não a oferta de "comprar" o exame. Se eu aceitar, eu passo mesmo que não saiba nem onde fica o acelerador; se eu não aceitar, não passo nem por decreto.
Isso tudo preocupa bastante, porque eu certamente não vou dar nenhum centavo pra examinador corrupto. Tenho destinos mais honrosos pro meu dinheiro - que não vem fácil.
Mas, de um jeito ou de outro, estou ansioso para começar logo as aulas práticas. Aprender a dirigir é algo que venho adiando há quase dez anos, e hoje em dia me arrependo de não ter aproveitado a chance quando pude. De qualquer maneira, não adianta chorar sobre o leite derramado, e é melhor fazer isso logo de uma vez - quanto antes, melhor.
De fato, 2008 tem sido o ano em que tenho posto em dia velhos desejos do passado. Um deles é aprender a dirigir. O outro é ter finalmente um instrumento e aprender a utilizá-lo.
Por sinal, agora minha Les Paul tem nome: Darlene. A referência eu não explico - acho mais divertido ver as pessoas tentando adivinhar. Se bem que A essa altura do campeonato bastante gente já deve saber de onde vem, porque a Quel fez o favor de spoilar tudo. Bad, bad Quel.
Comecei as aulas de guitarra ontem, e o professor me passou uma montanha de exercícios. O bom é que fazer esses exercícios já melhorou sensivelmente meu desempenho. Sim, isso mesmo: de ontem pra hoje já deu pra perceber a diferença. Claro que entusiasmo conta muito nessas horas, mas é muito gratificante ver que estou progredindo em coisas como trocar acordes e dedilhado. Estou bem animado pra ver quando sai a primeira música inteira.
Eu só queria poder voltar a sentir esse tipo de entusiasmo com minha dissertação.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Now she needs a name
My work is almost finished, and I think I'll be able to defend by the end of July. I'm still a bit worried about certain (theoretical) aspects, but I believe it's going to be alright.
That being said, I finally, after many years of hesitation, acquired an instrument: an Epiphone Les Paul Special.
Now I'm in the process of choosing a name for her. I know this may seem like an irrelevant thing, but I assure you it is not. And since I am taking it seriously, it is a tough decision. Until now, three "candidates" have been brought up by friends of mine: "Gud", "Ungoliant" and "Pandora". I haven't decided yet because there's another possibility I'm playing with, which is choosing a name related to Led Zeppelin, since it's my favorite band.
Even though this is not the most exciting subject in the planet, nor is it very important (except to me), I thought I should share it here. After all, it's been a long time since I blog'n posted.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Fooling around with The GIMP
Today I decided to do something different. And, taking advantage of my "starbucksy" mood, I managed to take this:
and make it look like this:
and then like this:
I realize this is not much, but at least I managed to remember a few basic stuff about image manipulation. The result is kinda cool, but I'm not sure yet if I'll end up using it somewhere or not.
Explaining the "starbucksy" mood: today I received my MASP City Mug. For those of you wondering, MASP stands for "Museu de Arte de São Paulo", a museum located here in São Paulo.
Saturday, March 08, 2008
Human-cyborg relations
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Not... screwed?
But she did want to do it when we first talked about it... oh well.
Saturday, February 09, 2008
Oh fuck.
I had MONTHS do to something, and I didn't. The only excuse I have is that I don't even know where to begin to do something like what I had to do.
Anyway, I'm screwed. Big time.
Wednesday, February 06, 2008
Throwing away some garbage
Although this is not the first time I do that, this time it was inspired by a friend's parents, whose... strong opinions in these matters have been quite insightful. There's a load of paper and other stuff that I gathered along the past few years, and I haven't used most of it for almost anything.
The largest of them is a metal shelf I've had with me for a long time. It used to hold my books and CD's a few years ago, but since moving to the place I'm living in now, it's been put aside, literally rotting away. I have already offered if for free to a couple people (1, 2), who showed some interest in it, but to be honest, I'm tired of waiting. It's going away.
Actually, I'm using the shelf as an excuse to throw some other stuff away, too. But most of it has just been taking up space, really, and I want to free up some space around here.
Monday, January 28, 2008
More useless statistics
Today, I noticed a pretty cool feature: it shows me, regarding hits on the blog coming from search engines, the search keywords that caused Stairway to Geekiness to show up in the results. What took me by surprise is that, for every single month since July 2007, except for October 2007, the #1 search people made and followed to my blog was "copy pasta". No kidding.
When I trace the visits, they all were to a post in June 2007, when I incidentally used the term to talk about an ethically questionable individual from my Institute.
The second most followed search keyword is linux spdif. This one actually makes me happy. Some time ago I made a post about how to make S/PDIF output work under linux, in hopes it would help somebody else. Apparently, it did.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Six more months
I can't say this is what I've been hoping for. I actually would prefer receiving word about my PhD - I need to be sure it is going to happen. This actually worries me a lot, because that's my only chance of getting to keep working in the academic environment for now. I'm not sure what I'm going to do if I don't get the funding.
I won't say I'm not happy about the renewal - I welcome it with wide open arms. It's just that, although nothing is certain about my PhD yet, I was kind of counting on having a bigger stipend beginning sometime around the middle of this year. I'm finally getting rid of all my financial problems and I wanted to have some more breathing room for using the extra money I would get to start building up my future. This sounds cheesy at best, but I don't really have other way of saying it.
The fact is, I'm almost 27 years old and all I own is in my bedroom (which is not actually mine). This is not even close to where I wanted to be ten years ago.
Come to think of it, ten years ago I was entering my final year in high school, and preparing myself to enter college. My expectations were completely different then. I had a clear path ahead of me, I knew exactly what I wanted. Looking back at the plans I made then I can't help but feel a bit guilty of failing to live up to those expectations. In high school I was a good student, my grades were great and I basically could do anything I wanted. That certainly changed a lot once I got into college. My grades were never the same, I took longer - way longer - than I expected to graduate and I ended up in an area I would never imagine I would have any interest in. Not that I dislike what I do now, mind you, I'm just saying that ten years ago I wouldn't even have considered working with crystallography and applied physics.
I admit I learned a lot in the past ten years. Not only in physics, but as a person as well. Not that it's an unexpected thing, I believe everyone really finishes growing up during this period in their lives. However, I wish I was more mature when I began than I was. It would have saved me a lot of trouble and would have made my life a lot easier. And, although I did graduate, I can't help but feel a bit troubled by the fact that my knowledge of physics is not as extensive as I think it should be. Although I passed all the needed courses during my graduation, I fail to recollect the knowledge I allegedly acquired during those courses, with a few exceptions. Surely I can explain the basics of the inner workings of the atomic nucleus, or how Maxwell's equations give rise to the wave equation of electromagnetic radiation. But I would have serious problems trying to explain those things in detail, or more advanced topics - although I supposedly studied them. Then, of course, all of this rambling might just be completely pointless, since I haven't reviewed those topics in a while and I'm just being neurotic about it - this certainly wouldn't be unheard of.
All in all, I honestly believe everyone asks themselves whether or not their own ten-year-youger-selves would approve of them now. I do have a lot of concerns about my future, and I have no idea where I'm going to be ten years from now, but worrying too much about those concerns will only make them become reality. The best I can do is aim for the best.