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Tuesday, September 07, 2010

The only thing that never changes is change itself

A month and a half after my last post, here I am with the feeling that it was a much longer time ago that I wrote that quick note about being half-way through with the year. And I still recall the feeling I had at that moment, that I don’t have a home.

Of course I have an address, and a place where most of my stuff is. But that’s not my home. It isn’t where I live; it’s just where my things are, and when I go there I feel more like a visitor than like a resident. The other place where I can get snail mail is ever farther away from being a home: it’s just a convenient place where I go to sleep.

That feeling is stil with me. But, for now, I just need to manage it as best as I can, because that’s the way things are; eventually I will get my own place.

Anyway, even though it’s been barely a month and a half since my last post it feels like so much more for a few reasons. The first and obvious of them is that a lot has happened since then; like my second visit to Europe, for instance, which was amazing. I visited a good friend that I hadn’t seen for years, got to know two beautiful cities, made some very important contacts with amazing people. There were some… mishappenings also, but I’d rather not talk about them. Let’s just say that sometimes certain people completely fail to understand my point of view.

There’s also been a lot of work; a trip to Rome that had to be cancelled; one historical moment when I met an amazing friend who is the bravest person I’ve ever met for doing two PhD’s simultaneouosly. And, more recently, a wonderful trip to Foz do Iguaçu, where the waterfalls presented me with one of the most amazing sights I’ve ever seen.

All in all, I believe this period of my life still has a lot to do with a kind of renovation that had a kickstart almost a year ago, and a great part of my thoughts go in the direction of trying to find my new identity.

Sometimes I wish it never ends.